Thursday, April 07, 2011

Scorecard


There are three crappy films that are trying to get made about the TLB Murders and one half crappy one. Let's discuss.

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1- The Family-based on the book by Ed Sanders except not really since the book is just a bunch of newspaper articles strung together and typed up by mongoloids. OOO ee OOO indeed. Screenplay by the guy who wrote the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake (dear god!) Scott Kosar. Tells the story mostly through the eyes of Snake Lake, because, well, no fucking reason. Screenwriter poor, accuracy in the garbage, weak project overall. Been floating around Hollywood for at least 8 years maybe longer. Recently attached Ryan Kwanten from True Blood and nobody cared. Decent pedigree by Hollywood standards. Kosar wants to direct and well, isn't a director. About once a year they throw this up a tree and see who will salute it. Not gonna happen.
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2- The Manson Girls- now EYES OF A DREAMER- shitty script that is an abomination against god and man. Originally written by Matthew Bright who was going to direct it. Now apparently some photographer who doesn't direct is going to direct it. Tells the story through the eyes of Nancy Pitman and along the way tries to make her into a nice guy. You know, by ignoring all the bad shit she did. Wyman stirred shit up years ago by offering the role of Nancy to Lindsay Lohan. She accepted it in between lines of blow then forgot about it. No one has bothered to mention that the new director is screwy. Wyman, apparently upset that this shitfest hasn't been filmed yet, recently "offered" the role of Sharon Tate (about 3 pages in the script I have) to Lindsay Lohan. Lohan is looking at jail time and is not bondable for a film, but the offer got Wyman more attention. Too bad the film won't be happening anytime soon.

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3- The Manson Girls- shitty script by a half assed filmmaker, we started to review it and then vommed in our hat. Samantha Lo Mein is directing. Tells the story ...well it doesn't. There are made up girls and bs incidents. There is some socialite that isn't real and she tells part of the story. The chick that wrote this is nuts. She offered the roles to all sorts of actresses who are too old and wrong for the part and she didn't have the money for the film. I think she thought the fairies would finance it or something. Prognosis- doesn't matter how low the budget, the script is NONSENSE and the film won't be happening soon.

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4- The Dead Circus- cult novel that is really about the death of Bobby Fuller, 60s singer. Have not read script. Producer announces casting which is partially denied. In announcement reporter makes clear that financing not in place. Cyclops from X-Men to play short Charlie Manson (okay then) but then he refuses to say yes he is to TMZ. Director has never directed before. Story surrounds major Manson Family member Alice McMillan and her quest for the lost snuff tapes that never existed outside of Sander's bong. Silly art film that may happen since there are real people involved but if I had to vote, the computer says no.

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There that catches us up.

Why do people do this? Because they can. Maybe just maybe they think, the attention will get their shitty scripts greenlit.

Boulevard of Broken Dreams baby.

Do you want me to finish reviewing this nonsense? I will. Unless you don't give a shit.

5 comments:

jill said...

i think it is interesting to note how far these scripts veer from the truth, they don't even seem to follow anybody's view of what happened

MrPoirot said...

Just like Spahn Ranch generated pulp cowboy movies of fantastical tales of the old west. It became a genre. Facts didn't matter. Who needs facts? Get some indians, throw in a couple of bar fights and duel it out in the street twixt the sheriff and Black Bart. Hang a rustler. Throw in some busty barmaids with low cut dresses dancing to a cheap piano and VOILLA'! You've got yourself a Western.

Nothing has changed at Spahn Ranch in 80 years except we remove the cowboys and substitute Hippies. Yee Ha! Ya gotta love a place like that.

Pristash said...

Whatever happens with the film notwithstanding, "The Dead Circus" is a really good novel and deserves to be read by any and all who have a thing about 1960s era pop culture of southern California. It's a sequel of sorts to "Stars Screaming" which also is good. Written by a lifelong LA er who has witnessed it and has heard every possible thing about almost all of it.

What I've read about the movie, they are changing the story substantially.

Panamint Patty said...

Collectively these little changes are the way that myths get started and why I still think that "Live Freaky! Die Freaky!" is the best Manson moive around (except for the Hendrickson one of course).

candy and nuts said...

Samantha Lo Mein omg hahahaha